an undamned river flowing

May 19, 2022

It can take me a while to slow down while camping. My instinct is to rush to set up camp, to pick up firewood, and to make a plan of where to explore. I know though that time moves infinitely slower outside — less distractions and preoccupations — the hours and seconds on the clock become meaningless. It takes a moment, but it always happens when I let it.

I just noticed these white birds moving effortlessly just inches above the water. I’m sitting in ease next to this great old sycamore tree. It makes me feel small. It makes me feel complete. It makes me feel inspired to be still and breathe.

My intention for this river trip is to settle in. Slow down time and think about the days ahead. I am soon to be leaving on a trip to Oregon. There are so many things to figure out and at the same time nothing at all to do. I am leaning into my own strengths for this trip and making up my journey as I go along. I’m going to drive through kansas, south dakota, wyoming, idaho, and maybe a part of colorado. I’m going to move slow. Let the present moments guide me. Stay in places that inspire. Move forward when it is time to go. This will be an experiment of listening — to myself, to the land, and to the spaces surrounding me.

But for these next few days, I am here on the buffalo river banks. Sleeping beneath the stars during a lightning storm and getting up in the morning to float on the water. Finding oneself within in a dream. Wandering among the sycamore trees.